My B-side

"Veil is Ruined in the Rain "

Marriage: Unappreciated dinners, pit-stained A-shirts, snoring, shaved stubble hibernating in the sink, remote Nazi-ness, more devotion to work than to breathing, grumbling, etc. etc.

Yuck! Why would anyone ever want to get married?? Look at all those ghastly cons. Perhaps, I’m pessimistic because of my hefty inability to keep a stable relationship with anyone of the opposite sex. I’m utterly hopeless.

I talked to Dano tonight about the temple. He told me not to worry, that I would in fact get married...and soon (anything is soon compared to a supposed 56 year wait). And yes, I’m talking about picture-drawing-mold-hating-Dano who swore I’d be single til at least age 65.

Lets say opportunity and preparation meet and voila! I’m Mrs. Something-Something.

What now? Impropable Perks of matrimony:

1. You’ll always have someone to chase around the house with a pudding covered dishrag.
2. Each night would be filled with hyena like laughter.
3. It would be cute to argue over something stupid and realize your ridiculousness; I mean you’ve endured so many things.
4. Always having someone to hold your hand, I mean REALLY hold your hand.
5. You could gross out the kids by woah-kissing in front of them.
6. You could talk about nothing for hours and come away feeling like it was the most important conversation ever held.
7. To watch your love bless your newborn baby. Wow.
8. To kneel across from them, to devote your entire life to one purpose…to make them and God happy, bonds impossible to break.
9. To breathe them in everyday…your one constant.
10. Free massages!
11. Someone to pray with each morning.
12. To have such crazy-love that even your children take notice, and know exactly what to look for when its time.
13. Someone who skips a day of work for an extra-long surprise weekend getaway.
14. To spend an eternity learning and discussing the mysteries of God with your best friend.
15. Having someone to just swing with on the porch.
16. Can you imagine walking down the aisle to him?!!??! Tears falling on both parties cheeks.
17. A supporter for when you want to create a coalition against the school’s corrupt PTA.
18. Someone to dance with on top of the dining table.
19. He won’t laugh when you have this undying urge to pop a tent and sleep in the backyard.
20. You’ll always have a home.

Nothing this good exists. Maybe thats why the world is so spastic?

posted by Melissa at 03:25